God I love Bon Jovi.
Merry Lammas everyone, and for those who have no clue what Lammas is, it's a Pagan sabbat, or holy day. I've been officially Wiccan (a branch of paganism) since I was about 13. I'd always believe in a god/goddess and in the earth having it's own spirits and energies for as long as I could remember. It was only when I was 13 that I discovered it actually had a name. I was christened at birth, sent to sunday school when I lived in America, and dragged along to vaaaarious christian gatherings and celebrations throughout my childhood. But it just never clicked for me. I just went along with it whilst secretly believing what I believed and keeping myself to myself.
10-11 years on here I am. I've always believed although my actually 'practicing the faith' has been admittedly on and off due to various constraints. But now I live alone I'm able to do what I like and it's led me to be able to practice regularly again.
I should clarify really what I mean by practice.. practicing to me is prayers, and doing rituals based around prayers, 'talks' to deities and occasional magick anAnyway, this blog isn't about Bon Jovi. d ''spellwork''. The main focus is really on the prayers and talks but sometimes they overlap. It's difficult to explain to those who don't believe, as most would categorise me a witch and be done with it. I'm not a witch. And yes, there IS a difference. Witches do exist, although not in the way movies portray them. Not all wiccans are witches and not all witches are wiccans.. The subtle difference is the magic part. Witches do the magic and the spells but wiccans are more focused on the beliefs and prayers and sometimes do magic. But anyway, I digress..
My beliefs have always been important to me. They've always been there when I've needed them and especially this year, have seen me through some very, very rough times. Although sometimes it's not as great as you'd think. This will sound crazy to most people but, I see, hear and feel things. I've come to call them little visions. Flashes of images, sounds, and strings of coincidences which eventually link and then I have a kind of realisation as to what it was about. Often it's things that either mean something or actually happen. I've had a lot of things which actually happen that I've seen. The other things eventually reveal a meaning, like a message. Sometimes they are very difficult to work out and it can be incredibly frustrating. All in all it has just strengthened by belief in 'everything happens for a reason'. Because, in my experience. It does and the visions and things link into it and give me a meaning. A reason. Which in turn strengthens my belief.
On various occasions I've tried to keep a log of my visions and things but I never keep it up. No idea why really. I guess sometimes I don't need to. If it works out it's generally pretty obvious, but I should keep a record really. If only for my info and so I can look back. For the moment, I'm just content in knowing that it's there if I need it, a bit of guidance and a helping hand through life. Most mainstream beliefs are based on essentially make believe, which is fair enough if you believe strong enough in it. But to me I believe in something I can see feel smell touch taste... I believe in the earth and the energies within it. I pray to gods/goddesses, but those gods/goddesses are the energies of nature... Diana, the moon, Gaia, the earth... Things you can see and know are there... you can feel the energy... if you're open enough to it. Through years of belief and practice I can feel it now. When I pray I feel the energies running through me and can channel them. Although I'm fully aware skeptics will now be thinking ''What drugs is she on and where can I get some''. It's hard to explain. You'll just have to believe me.
Yes, you do think I'm nuts, don't you? But everyone needs something to believe in. For some that belief is simply in not needing a divinity to believe in, and just believing in human nature as it is. Everyone has something. Even if they don't know it.
Merry Lammas all. For now I'll leave you with a pic of the sunset I took just after finishing my prayers tonight.
)O(
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