Debt and Apathy

Days like today remind me why I've chosen the career I have. For those who aren't aware I'm an advisor for the Citizens Advice Bureau. Planning on one day specialising in Debt Casework.

I love my job. I have to love my job to be still doing it, as since April 2008 it's been 95% voluntary. I was taken on one day a week as a paid Advisor in addition to my voluntary days in May 09. So up until then I was totally voluntary, and I continue to do one day paid, 2/3 voluntary now. Which goes to show the extent at which I love my job. I've finally found something I am good at. Helping people. I've always been that way though, I've always been the one to sacrifice herself to sort other people out, and always the one people came to with problems. People know I'd either fix it, or I'd be able to give them advice about it. It took 23 years to find myself a career after many failed attempts at retraining. Well I say failed, I was very successful at retraining. I'm a qualified Photographer, nursery nurse, and I have a National Association of Goldsmiths Certificate in Retail Jewellery, plus various other certificates and the like. But having children and being the 'stay at home mum' (Not through choice, may I add.) meant I had to sacrifice a career. Twice.

But, I've said it before and I'll say it again. Everything happens for a reason. I truly believe that.

The way I got into wanting to help people and specialise in debt advice came from my own personal circumstances. During the course of my marriage, myself and my ex mounted up numerous debts. About 16k in all. It was going through the torment of me sorting this out that spurred me into wanting to use the knowledge I'd gained by helping others. I regularly used moneysavingexpert.com and became a bit of a minor celeb on there... keeping a debt diary followed by countless people and giving advice to those who followed, I even appeared twice on Martin Lewis' It Pays to Watch.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dHv8gVUr8EY

So here I am today. A soon to be divorcee, and on the road to becoming a debt advisor. Funny how things work out...

Debt wise I have around about £1500 to my name now. My ex took the car, and the related hire purchase debt, with him when he left. I was, at one point, debt free. But then I discovered that in typical me fashion, drama is never far away, and unexpected costs such as the washing machine breaking down (sliiiiiightly essential when you have a family to run...) aren't exactly affordable when you're a single mother on benefits.. so the debt was run up again. At the moment it's stable and has been for a while at around the £1500 mark, and is managable so I'm not worried. It bugs me, I won't lie. I hate owing anyone money. I hate it. I suppose that's partly due to the enforced frugal life I lived (and still live now..) while trying to get out of the original marriage debt. I still count EVERY penny, and find it incredibly hard to justify spending any money. At all. I really have to push myself, which leads to inevitable occasional splurges. (I have quite a weakness for Bass guitars... oops...)

Without wishing to moan this past year or so has been a nightmare, emotionally and financially. I can't remember ever having such a difficult year as I've had. It's taken a long, long time to feel myself again. I have to say really that my children and my job have been the only things keeping me going at some points. I'm absolutely amazed that I managed to get through any of it in one piece. I've never been that low without being clinically depressed, and I never, ever want to get there again. I'm so thankful I had my job. It gave me something to focus on. The ironic thing is that in my job, you help other people and can forget about your own while focussing on someone elses. And I think in a way that has helped me through a very, very difficult time of my life.

Now I am in a better position myself, I'm actually starting to realise that those people I helped, also helped me, although they didn't know it. I've always been a very apathetic person. I all too often put myself mentally in the situations of people I speak to. I feel for them, and I feel what they're feeling. At work that is even more prevalent. Today for example, I saw a debt client who was incredibly distressed with their situation. She had come in with their husband, and because of their debt she was seriously considering 'seperating' from her husband, simply so they could claim benefits and each the financial strain they were under together. They had no relationship problems, they were just that desperate, that it was seriously being considered that they end their happy emotional lives together, because of debt. She became incredibly upset and all you can do is tell them the facts. The sad thing is I'm not a counsellor. I'm an advisor. I advise people on law and practical matters. All you want to do with clients like those is just cry with them. The desperation they feel is beyond comprehension. But that's the thing. I've been there. I know how awful it is. I know how desperate you can be and feel there's no way out. It's no wonder many people commit suicide over debt problems.

I truly believe that the creditors are part of the problem. Some of them are disgusting. Ruthless. Aggressive. They bully and frighten people into paying money they can't afford without care for the implications.

Final demand letters are littered with scare tactics...
PRE LITIGATION NOTICE....
BALIFFS..
SOLICITORS...
COURT ACTION..
CHARGING ORDERS..
DEDUCTIONS FROM EARNINGS...
YOU HAVE 7 DAYS TO PAY OR WE SHALL INSTRUCT OUR CLIENT TO APPLY FOR A COMMITAL TO PRISON ORDER..

Bold, red type, capital letters, big words the customer isn't sure to understand.. anything.. to scrape that last tiny penny out of them. Anything. Can't eat for a week? Who cares, we want our money. Have to sell your body on the street? So what you owe us £100 now pay up!!

Bastards.

I do have to say, I have dealt with some creditors that are exemplary. They go beyond themselves to help struggling clients and work with us. But some are absolutely disgusting. Obviously I can't go into details, but some of the things I've seen are shocking.

If anything it just gives me more drive to help the client. People can't help getting into problems sometimes. The aforementioned distressed cl was ripped off for thousands by a solicitor which is pending court action for compensation, but until then.. what do they live on? Bread and water?

''Of course.. now pay up.'' says the creditor.

Grrrr...